My Sister is Weird

My sister looks at the world through a different lens than most. After spending time with her last month, I was reminded of her… quirkiness. She flew in from Washington, DC, and we took my mother away to an inn and spa for the weekend to celebrate my mother’s birthday.

Thanks to Boston traffic, the drive took twice as long as it should, so I got to hear twice as many comments and questions from the back seat, without much pause in between. “I write my taxes out long-hand.” “We can eat lunch in our robes after the spa! I saw it on the web site.” “When you were in Colorado, did you smoke pot?” “Why would anyone play the lottery? Winning just causes problems.” “I invented writing in the sand and taking a picture of it. Now everyone is copying me.” “We don’t need wine.” Wait, what?! “How can you not like lobster?” “Are you hungry? I have half a banana,” as she hands me a partially peeled banana from breakfast 6 hours earlier. Who eats half a banana? And then saves it?

When we arrived, I pulled into a small town common with local businesses. She was so in awe, you would have thought she was 6 and we just entered Santa’s Workshop. “Look, there’s a guy with a pizza!” I looked, expecting the pizza to be 10-feet in diameter or balanced on the top of his head. Nope, just a guy carrying a pizza.

My sister, a couple years older than me, has never sworn or done anything remotely close to illegal. My whole life, I’ve heard, “You’re so BAAAAAD.” (I’m really not.) She says she gets too much vacation time; it should be scaled back. Really?! Every restaurant portion “is too big,” yet I’ve never seen her not finish her meal or share my dessert that she is “too stuffed to eat.” She goes to dinner hours before my 72-year old mother ever would. When she texts me, she includes as many Emojis in one message as humanly possible. She still uses a Windows 95 PC at home.

Not to alarm you, but she works for the government and is in charge of billions of dollars.

Would she be someone I would have chosen as a friend? Not likely. But she’s family. So we keep in touch, visit, and occasionally go away together. I’m reminded of work relationships. Some colleagues are people who you would choose as friends, and maybe even are. Others are not but you work together, so you need to communicate, attend meetings together, and collaborate on projects.

The first step in doing that successfully is realizing that normal is just a perceived standard deviation from yourself. We all think we are the measure of normalcy. I’m sure my sister thinks I’m weird. (I’m not.) Nor is anyone we work with. We are all just unique. I love how much DFCI embraces diversity. If everyone was like me, how boring would that be? I learn from others, and hopefully they learn from me. Others make me laugh and smile, and hopefully I do the same for them. I am in awe and inspired by others, and hopefully I spark something in others, too.

Get to know a little bit about your colleagues. I guarantee you’ll find something about their life interesting that may enrich your own. My sister is not weird. We are different people, but I appreciate her honesty, her intellect, and the child-like innocence through which she experiences life. I may try it myself. But with a glass of red wine.