It has been nearly four years since Tim Russert’s unexpected passing. He was admired by many and I believe that his shoes will never quite be filled. You may remember when he scribbled, “Florida, Florida, Florida” on a whiteboard while covering Election Night 2000. Although I have never been an enthusiastic follower of politics, I occasionally tuned in on Sunday mornings to watch Meet the Press. I was drawn to Tim’s thoughtful and thorough style of interrogation – he did his homework and would press guests relentlessly on past statements and contradictions.
Perhaps it was his blue collar roots that made me connect with him. He grew up in Buffalo, the son of a sanitation worker. I was deeply touched when I came across a quote – “There is not a day that goes by that I don’t say to my son, ‘You are always, always loved, but you are never, never entitled.’” As I recall, his son turned out pretty well.
I wish I had come across this quote before my daughter was out of the nest, but luckily, she became a lovely and successful young woman. I do remember, like it was yesterday, when she got her first after-school job as a waitress in a donut shop. I hate to admit it, but I had a fleeting thought that nobody would like her because she would be lazy and do as little as possible. Au contraire! During the slow period after the morning rush, she would do things such as shine the toaster, restock supplies, and if necessary, tidy up. When it was busy, if a teammate was busier, she would pitch in and help them out. My little Emily was a model employee and very quickly received a pay raise!
I recently rediscovered a book that was buried in my pile of unread books – QBQ: The Question Behind the Question. John G. Miller could have entitled his book, “Stop Your Whining and Do Something About It!” Makes me think of the lyrics to a Rolling Stones song – “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you might find, you get what you need.” I think that in a way, I needed to read this book at this point in my life and career – sort of a tune up for my human machine, my mind, and my heart. The idea is that rather than blaming the vendor or upper management or your teammates or solar flares or the full moon, you ask or think to yourself, “How can I help?”
You might wonder how on earth this is connected to project management. So what am I talking about – this quality or trait that I value so dearly, and for which I strive? Simply put, it is personal responsibility and accountability. This applies to all of us – teachers and students, parents and children, vendors and customers, project managers and team members of all levels, etc. You get the idea.
Can you imagine what would have happened with the Apollo 13 mission if the astronauts sat back and blamed NASA for their problems and took no action? Can you think of situations where you sat back and watched, feeling frustrated as a project floundered? Perhaps you asked, “Why don’t they…’” or wondered, “How could they . . .” when in fact you should be asking, “What can I do…”
I am sure that most of us have stepped up when given a difficult situation, but I know that from personal experience, there are times when I have complained and blamed, perhaps even to the extent that I got tired of hearing myself complain! I challenge you to listen for the blaming thoughts and questions, and to “always, always” consider how you can help.
Great message, Deb!