Can we relate?

Project managers are driven by project success. PMs look to processes to manage success and they look to outcomes to measure it. Some measure success by project deliverables, others by the long-term impact of the project, some by project efficiency, like schedule and cost, yet others measure success by adhering to a project culture or a project vision. However you measure success, there is a lot to do before closing out a successful project. We comb through requirements, we look at risks, then research those risks, then we weigh them, and then we host meeting after meeting after meeting regarding them…but seriously, what is it that we depend on to be successful? In a selfish act of self-preservation, I’ve tried to answer that question many times.

I have worked on lots of different projects, different types, different sizes, and for different types and sizes of organizations. From world-class cancer institutes (that’s us) to one-machine clinics in the middle of nowhere, and everything in between. Throughout, there has always been one common thread to success. You guessed it, PEOPLE. But it is not their expertise that does it. It is the relationships. I believe that the relationships we make with the people on our project team are central to our project’s success. Simple, right? Here are some of my ideas about building good relationships. 

– Relationships rely on communication. Building effective communication takes an active, generous listener. Listen with intention and make sure you understand what the speaker is saying and if you don’t, ask questions, lots of specific questions. Being an active listener shows intent and interest.

– When listening, look for common ground. A common topic or interest is a great way to connect with a person. Finding even the most distant connection is a great way to start a relationship. Take note of anything that is shared between you, your team members, and your team itself.

– Being part of a team is rewarding, but we are individuals first. Recognize that each member of the team is unique and that they may have their own intentions and individual goals. If we listen and communicate well, we can find that we have shared goals. Find a shared goal and find ways to highlight those shared goals during your communications. Look for opportunities to lead those shared goals and if you can, commit to delivering on a shared goal.

– Relationships require attention. Be attentive to your colleagues and recognize how your team and team members communicate. Be willing and flexible to meet their communication needs.

– Be respectful. That is an obvious one, but when communicating about project issues or problems we should be especially respectful and avoid blaming. Blame doesn’t do your project or relationship any good. Remember, and this is important, remember to include a hefty amount of praise at the same time. Explaining poor outcomes with respect, honesty, and a bit of praise will highlight the problem while not damaging or jeopardizing the relationship. 

– Strong relationships depend on trust. Building trust takes time. Put the time in by being in touch with your team routinely and making yourself available to them. Always pick up the phone, always respond to a message, and be willing and eager to meet with your colleagues and team even when it may be inconvenient.

– Be kind whenever possible. All of us have personal lives and many of us at one time or another may be carrying a heavy load or going through something. Being kind takes effort, but it is easy if you practice.  

So, there you have it, my first blog post is in the books. Was it a success? Maybe, but we all measure success differently and that’s a good thing. Projects are different though. Project success is defined and finding a path to shared success isn’t easy, but it is vital. Vital to the project’s success, and vital for us to find purpose. When we share success, we thrive. I often remind myself that relationships are our connection to the world and that they are foundational to who we are. Project management is no different, except that projects have end dates and relationships don’t have to.